Igniting a passion in a younger generation for the craft of writing is a beautiful thing. I suspect we will see some small rejection of social media norms in favor of more personal gathering spaces, and it will begin with that same generation. That desire will have been fostered by willing people like you, Johnathan. Great job!
Thank you, Brian! I'm very happy with the outcome and the positivity shown by the students, despite the mainstream media's recent dire predictions of literature's future downfall.
That's an exceptionally enigmatic story. Which I guess was your intention. Obviously it makes me think of End of Eternity, but that's a good thing.
If you want my feedback then I would say it's exceptionally well written and crafted, especially in terms of the narrative structure (which is ironic of course since it's about time-stuff), which dives straight into the action, sets up the tension, then a little flashback explanation, then on to the denouement, and a twisty ending. Your title of course gives away the ending which I guess is also the point. Which is even better done because as a reader one is still hoping he will succeed in his task. So, to be able to get a reader to root for the character despite knowing the end is very good writing.
It is also the kind of story that compels you to think about it afterwards. Maybe even read it again. That enigmatic last line, I mean.
I'm afraid I haven't read Atwood so I can't get those bonus points. Although I can hazard a guess it's something about 'air of the future' or 'time and tradition' or somesuch.
I'm pleased you had such a rewarding time at your gathering. And well done you for getting through it. It must be a lovely feeling indeed when a student approaches you in that way.
All the feedback I've had (including for a very rough half draft which was entirely rewritten) has been incorporated into the version you've read. And yes, it's one of my few short stories which is calling out for a longer treatment. I like these two characters and what might be inferred about their entwined histories. Paradoxes be damned!
Yes - that unanswered question about the relationship between the two characters is one of the intriguing bits. I do hope you write it one day (and share it, obviously).
It is a good question about feedback on Substack. Maybe it's just simple psychology and people are worried about being critical - not because the feedback is offensive or negative, but due to fears that the other person might take it the wrong way. When you're in a real world situation with people you know and trust and see (as opposed to online) you don't have those fears. I can well imagine that's how it is in your writing group because everyone knows each other and they know the feedback is always meant with the best of intentions.
Igniting a passion in a younger generation for the craft of writing is a beautiful thing. I suspect we will see some small rejection of social media norms in favor of more personal gathering spaces, and it will begin with that same generation. That desire will have been fostered by willing people like you, Johnathan. Great job!
Thank you, Brian! I'm very happy with the outcome and the positivity shown by the students, despite the mainstream media's recent dire predictions of literature's future downfall.
That's an exceptionally enigmatic story. Which I guess was your intention. Obviously it makes me think of End of Eternity, but that's a good thing.
If you want my feedback then I would say it's exceptionally well written and crafted, especially in terms of the narrative structure (which is ironic of course since it's about time-stuff), which dives straight into the action, sets up the tension, then a little flashback explanation, then on to the denouement, and a twisty ending. Your title of course gives away the ending which I guess is also the point. Which is even better done because as a reader one is still hoping he will succeed in his task. So, to be able to get a reader to root for the character despite knowing the end is very good writing.
It is also the kind of story that compels you to think about it afterwards. Maybe even read it again. That enigmatic last line, I mean.
I'm afraid I haven't read Atwood so I can't get those bonus points. Although I can hazard a guess it's something about 'air of the future' or 'time and tradition' or somesuch.
I'm pleased you had such a rewarding time at your gathering. And well done you for getting through it. It must be a lovely feeling indeed when a student approaches you in that way.
P.S. that's a really good pic of you.
P.P.S. I don't know what other sort of feedback you got on this story but I wouldn't change a damn word if I were you. It's flawless as it is.
Oh, and the other initial/instinctive thought I had was that it's an excellent teaser for a longer story (how long? don't know.)
All the feedback I've had (including for a very rough half draft which was entirely rewritten) has been incorporated into the version you've read. And yes, it's one of my few short stories which is calling out for a longer treatment. I like these two characters and what might be inferred about their entwined histories. Paradoxes be damned!
It must've been very good feedback in that case!
Yes - that unanswered question about the relationship between the two characters is one of the intriguing bits. I do hope you write it one day (and share it, obviously).
Within the group we always try to give back as much as we take away. It's somehow harder to do this on Substack – I'm still not sure why...
It is a good question about feedback on Substack. Maybe it's just simple psychology and people are worried about being critical - not because the feedback is offensive or negative, but due to fears that the other person might take it the wrong way. When you're in a real world situation with people you know and trust and see (as opposed to online) you don't have those fears. I can well imagine that's how it is in your writing group because everyone knows each other and they know the feedback is always meant with the best of intentions.
That's my guess anyhow.
An excellent 'guess'.
Really enjoyed this. Well done.